OLD MAN GLOOM - NO 
2xLP/CD/Cassette/t-shirt/ladies t-shirt/longsleeve/hoodie 
Available for pre-order now!

We would write a rambling, somewhat entertaining blurb about how great the record is, and too bad you weren't at the shows to get it early (neither were we), or even if you were you didn't get the limited pre-order exclusive shirt/hoodie, and how it will be hilarious when someone asks if you've listened to any good records lately and you shout "NO!" with all the force of a sentient simian research scientist seeking sonic solutions to somnolent sedentary styles of living through voluble auditory vocal projection (not unlike that practiced by Institute Researchers Aaron Turner, Caleb Scofield, and Nate Newton in recent field experiments), thus confusing and alarming your inquirer and leading to potential future awkward social engagements, but we figure you don't have time to read another run-on sentenced blog post from us when you could be carving your place amongst the chosen few who will have the new OLD MAN GLOOM album in all of it's quaking glory upon it's official release date (June 26th), along with items of clothing that will only be produced prior to the release, and thereafter unavailable for purchase, making your wardrobe the envy of those slower and less attentive to our various information outlets who also appreciate the strange, humbling, deafening heaviness of OMG, and who probably didn't get one of the limited vinyl colors because they dilly dallied on their way to the Hydra Head Shop to order the 2xLP, maybe to read another article on the internet about bizarre undersea creatures caught on robotic cameras, or a blog post written for the amusement of the few obsessive computer addicts who feel obligated to keep up to date on every word posted to the sites they follow (count some of us in this camp). No, we thought we would keep this short so you can be sure to get your opposable thumbs on the new OLD MAN GLOOM record, NO, on whichever color of whichever format you prefer before they are gone, along with one (or all) of the associated clothing options.